99 Problems but a Ticket Ain’t One

Greetings from the Second City!

For those that don't know, this is a nickname for the city of Chicago, Ill., intended to prevent anyone from accidentally comparing Chicago to New York (implicitly the "First City", or just "the City"). I'm currently staying with my Aunt and Uncle, whom I do not see nearly enough, after two long days of driving across the eastern half of the United States.

A random sampling of thoughts from my trip thus far:

• My trip across the country has been especially exciting because I am really, really bad at driving. I started out the trip on a high note at the drive-thru at the McDonald's of Port Jefferson Station. I mention this now, but seemed to have forgotten it at the time when I drove past the giant menu board where one customarily orders and instead went straight to the pay window. It was only when I got to this window that I realized I had nothing to pay for and likely became the first customer in the history of the MOPJS (and maybe McDonald's, anywhere) to pull up to the drive-thru in reverse. I've ordered a lot of large cokes in my life, but this was easily the order with the most style.
  

  
  

• Not only did I commit a social faux pas in reverse, I have already broken the law on two separate occasions (Welcome, Mr. and Mrs. Taube!).
  

  I was driving 80 in a 65 mile-per-hour speed trap near Youngstown, Ohio when I accidentally passed a police car posted up in the median. Or rather, the policeman had been posted in the median until he started following me. It was at this point that it occurred to me that, in the future, I should probably refrain from speeding while driving with an expired license. It also occurred to me, once the police car's siren went off, that in the present I was completely and totally fucked. On the bright side, I thought as I pulled over to the side of the road, I would at least get to pretend I was Jay-Z in 99 Problems. I was about a quarter of the way through my fantasized interaction with the police officer ("'Cause I'm young, and I'm Jewish, and my hat's real low?"), when I caught a glimpse of the car in question whizzing by my passenger-side window in pursuit of an 18-wheeler. I'm sure there is a valuable lesson in here somewhere, but I can't quite put my finger on it just yet.
  

  This near disaster came less than 24-hours after a similar near-dustup with the law in New Jersey. For those that have been fortunate enough not to have spent any time in the Jerz, it is actually a violation of state law for a driver to pump gasoline into his or her own car. The picture below is of a gas station attendant at a disarmingly redneck truckstop in northwestern NJ near the Pennsylvania border. You will notice, though, that our friend has his back turned to me while he pumps gas into min-van with New Jersey plates. I, however, am a New Yorker perfectly capable of pumping his own damn gas. It was then that I turned off my car and sprung to action, filling my car with a tank's worth of revenge for all of unnecessary tip money the rest of us have been fleeced out of in America's Largest Landfill.
  

• Gary, Indiana is actually nothing like it's portrayed in the eponymous song from the musical "The Music Man". I won't go into further detail, but if there's any way you can avoid a trip to Gary or nearby East Chicago, you should probably do that.
  

  
  

• Just out of principle, I'm not shaving until I reach Seattle.
  

  
  

That's about all I've got for you guys right now. Everything's been great, and I'm really excited to get back out on the road. I should be crossing the Mississippi today, so I'll let everyone know how that goes.

Aaron Goes West

Greetings from the bustling metropolis of Port Jefferson, NY (Population: 6,000)!

Sorry it's been so long since I've updated, I 've been real busy with finals and packing up so I could head home for a few days.

I say for a few days because, as some of you likely know, I will be leaving shortly for the Seattle, WA, where I will be working at 710 ESPN Radio Seattle for the summer. I know what you're thinking. "But Aaron, Seattle is really, really far away from Long Island. However are you going to get there?"

I'm driving. Clear across the country, all by myself and hopefully in four or five days. Along the way, I'll be taking notes on what I see and rocking out to SO much Jay-Z. I plan to keep you folks updated of my whereabouts and share stories of the open road. If I play things right, I can be like a less obnoxious Sal Paradise.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go try and find music to load onto my iPod (any suggestions?) and start getting everything ready for my journey west. Talk to y'all soon.

-Aaron

Back to Business

In a lot of ways, today is the first real day of the New York Mets' 2010 campaign.

Don't get me wrong--Monday's Opening Day victory over the Marlins was wonderful. David Wright homered, Santana was excellent and the new guys (save Mike Jacobs) all looked great. Even Jeff Francouer managed to not chase anything way out of the strikezone long enough to work out a walk (I kid).

But Opening Day stands apart from the rest of the season. There's red, white and blue bunting and anticipation and everyone lined up on the foul line before the game and wildly fantastical projections afterward (David Wright is on pace to hit 162 home runs! Jason Heyward is the next Hank Aaron!). It is in this way that the second game of the season is really the first game of "the other 161". There's no pomp and circumstance tonight and I guarantee Citi Field will be less full on a Wednesday night than it was for the opener.

And that's why today is the real first day of the season. Tonight is the first night of long relievers and keeping the sound on in the background because you've got a paper due or somewhere to be or any of a number of life events you can't excuse yourself from lest some smartass remind you that you can just watch the same regular season baseball game (against the same team, no less!) tomorrow night or any of 160 nights after that.

Frankly, I'm excited. Because baseball's not about the casual fan who checks in with us on Opening Day, then again for a day at the park in June and then, if we're lucky, comes back to us for October. As any hack sportswriter will tell you, "It's a marathon, not a sprint,"--a daily routine six days out of seven for six months out of the year. Tonight, like the rest of the nights from here to October, is about us people who actually like baseball--the whole thing, not just the highlights and not just in person.

The ups and downs of a 162 game season make it somewhat of a grind, and there's no doubting the massive drain on my free time that comes with the warm weather of spring. It's a long season and the Mets will probably make me miserable a few times between now and their eventual fourth-place finish. But after six months without them, I'm really just glad to be along for the ride.

So tonight, Mayor Bloomberg won't be in attendance. The ceremonial first pitch will be thrown not by a Mets legend but by some faceless corporate middle manager instead. The actual first pitch will be thrown by mediocre John Maine instead of superhuman Johan Santana. While Citi Field opened for business Monday, tonight is the first night of business as usual.

Allow Me to Re-introduce Myself

My name is Aaron. For the first six years of my life, I was fairly certain I was going to be starting point guard for the New York Knicks. After all, I was the reigning MVP of the imaginary basketball league contested on the Fisher Price basketball hoop in the front hall of the house I grew up in on Long Island (I did not have any brothers and sisters...or many friends, apparently). Unfortunately, a move to competition against real human beings in the Infant Jesus basketball league of Port Jefferson would put a damper on my pro prospects.

Today, I’m an aspiring sports journalist/broadcaster at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. I co-host, SportsRap, an hour-long sports talk show on WXYC Campus Radio, cover women’s lacrosse and wrestling for the Daily Tar Heel, and serve as a volunteer videographer, editor and scriptwriter for Carolina Week Sports. I also work as a Public Address Announcer for the UNC Softball team.

When I’m not writing, filming, or talking sports, I enjoy well, watching sports, particularly college basketball and professional baseball. I’m perhaps one of the 50 biggest fans of the Stony Brook Seawolves (2009-10 America East Regular Season Champions and NIT Participants!) and like the New York Mets (undefeated, untied and unchallenged in 2010 as of this writing) only slightly less than I like breathing. I also enjoy hip-hop music, board games and American cultural history.

I started this blog as a place to express myself and work on my writing skills a bit. Here you’ll find some sports commentary, some random everyday life stories and probably a lot of griping about my beloved New York Mets. There’ll be bad puns and Jay-Z references and all sorts of embarrassing stories. We’re all going to have a really great time, so come back soon.

If you’ve got any comments, concerns or questions, or just want to chat, feel free to holler at me at ataube@email.unc.edu. I look forward to hearing from you.